Funny Kid Stories

On the first day of school my first graders were anxious to show me the things that they had brought to school in their backpacks. One little girl came up with a small memo book with a picture of a kitten on the front and told me "Mrs. Byers, I have 2 of these in my backpack!" I responded that it was very nice but, since we wouldn't be using them in school perhaps she could take it home and write in it or do some homework in it. With a huge smile, and as pleased as punch, she said, "It's a diarrhea! (diary!)" I could not stop laughing!

Terri

I worked in an Elementary School clinic for seven years. Needless to say, I have seen a lot of funny things in there. However, one day this sweet little girl came in. She had what appeared to be a cold in her right eye. Trying to rule out pink eye, I asked her if it was crusted over when she woke up that morning. She said, "Yes, I think the sleepy man put too much boogers in it!" Priceless huh?!
Melissa

My family was sitting down eating dinner, and our five year old seemed to be upset. She looked up at my husband and I and said "Mom Dad my teacher said a bad word at school today. I said "oh,no what did she say" She looked at my husband and I to see if she was going to get into trouble and said "Well, today we were learning about bugs, and she said that they were in-sex (insects)"
Lydia

A friend of mine was teaching an art lesson to several first graders. She was trying to get them to remember the colors, and how to make other colors from the primary colors. A little boy walked up to her, held up his first finger and said sweetly "Red". The teacher said that that was very good. He then held up his third finger and sweetly said "Blue". She again replied that that was good. Then she asked him "What color do those two colors make?" He then raised his fist in the air, proudly extended his middle finger and shouted"PURPLE!!!!"......just as the principal walked into the room. It took the principal three glasses of water and several tissues in order to compose herself and resume her day.
Leslie


I passed out snack to a class of kindergartners. One young man looked up at me and told me that he wanted to share his cookie. (He had licked, smeared and gobbered it all over his face.) I told him no thank you, and explained that I had gained weight over the winter break and needed to be careful about eating snacks. He looked at me and I could tell his little mind was thinking. I started to feel bad and decided I WOULD choke down the cookie somehow! But then he said, "Teacher, its ok, really, I think you look the same fatness!"